I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
