? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
he was CRYING into my vagina
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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