Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
