New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
