I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
