I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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