I'm drive I can fine osifer
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
