I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
