where am i from again
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
