weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
