I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
