I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
