And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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