i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
