the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
