nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
