Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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