im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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