my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
