Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
