he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
