On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
