you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize