I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
