JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
