is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
