don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
