Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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