i just wanna soil my oats bro
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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