just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Randomize
