its not stalking. its research.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
