Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
