it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
