We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
