I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
