he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
