I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm bleeding and have questions
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