I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
you're hired as official boob wrangler
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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