Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize