just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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