I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
