This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
