I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
