butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Randomize
