More tranny stories later!
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
