jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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