then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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