Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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