My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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