omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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