What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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